« Older Home
Loading Newer »

Devotional Thought - James 3:17-18

VERSE:
The wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness.

THOUGHT:
There aren’t many peacemakers sowing in peace and so righteousness is hard to find! Developing heavenly wisdom requires sacrificial action from us. Wisdom is not what you know but what you sow!

Alternate Definitions of Medical Terms

  • Benign…………….The birthday after you be eight.
  • Artery…………….The study of paintings.
  • Bacteria…………..Back door to cafeteria.
  • Barium…………….What to do when someone dies.
  • Cesarean Section……A neighborhood in Rome.
  • Cat scan……………Searching for kitty.
  • Cauterize………….Made eye contact with her.
  • Colic……………..A sheep dog.
  • Coma………………A punctuation mark.
  • D & C……………..Where Washington is.
  • Dilate…………….To live long.
  • Enema……………..Not a friend.
  • Fester…………….Quicker than someone else.
  • Fibula…………….A small lie.
  • Genital……………Non-Jewish person.
  • G.I. Series………..Military baseball tournament.
  • Hangnail…………..What you hang your coat on.
  • Impotent…………..Distinguished, well known.
  • Labour Pain…………Getting hurt at work.
  • Medical Staff………A Doctor’s cane.
  • Morbid…………….A higher offer than I bid.
  • Nitrates…………..Cheaper than day rates.
  • Node………………Was aware of
  • Outpatient…. …….A person who has fainted.
  • Post Operative……..A letter carrier.
  • Recovery Room………Place to do upholstery.
  • Secretion………….Hiding something.
  • Seizure……………Roman emperor.
  • Tablet…………….A small table.
  • Terminal Illness……Getting sick at the Bus Station
  • Tumor……………..More than one.
  • Varicose…………..Near by.
  • Vein………………Conceited.

Quotations - Preparation

“One of life’s most painful moments comes when we must admit that we didn’t do our homework, that we are not prepared.” —Merlin Olsen

“Man must be prepared for every event of life, for there is nothing that is durable.” —Menander of Athens

“Luck is when opportunity meets preparation. Perfect performance comes from painstaking preparation, often for weeks, months and years in advance.” —Brian Tracy

“It is better to be prepared for an opportunity and not have one than to have an opportunity and not be prepared.” —Whitney Young, Jr.

Email virus hoaxes and how to detect them

As if it wasn’t bad enough that people spread viruses through email, there are also email virus hoaxes! These hoaxes often instruct you to delete files from your hard drive or take other similar steps in order to “protect yourself” from a virus.

In the case of a virus hoax these messages are not true and often trick you into deleting important files from your computer. Then in an attempt to “warn” your friends and colleagues you willingly forward this message to all your friends and colleagues. Although you mean will you are just helping to spread this hoax.

With all the confusion and panic that computer viruses create, how can you separate a genuine virus report that requires action from one of these bogus hoaxes? Luckily there is help on the web thanks to a few pages that provide listings of these virus hoaxes and myths.

Next time you receive a message about a virus simply check one of these sites to see if it’s a real threat before taking any action or spreading the message to others:

  • Vmyths.com http://www.vmyths.com/ – This site has an A-Z index of hoaxes which you can search or browse, news of the latest hoaxes, links to helpful sites (including those dealing with “real” viruses), background articles and more. They also offer three quick tips on how to spot an email virus hoax. http://www.vmyths.com/resource.cfm?id=19&page=1
  • Symantec’s Virus Hoax Page http://www.symantec.com/avcenter/hoax.html – Symantec, the makers of the popular Norton Antivirus software, also have a page that lists the most common email virus hoaxes

Devotional Thought - Psalm 112:5

VERSE:
Good will come to him who is generous and lends freely, who conducts his affairs with justice.

THOUGHT:
Generosity is love expressed in practical ways with joy. Generosity and justice are two character traits more needed in our selfish world. They come from a heart touched by grace and from a Father who is gracoius.

Good News-Bad News for Pastors

Good News: You baptized seven people today in the river.
Bad News: You lost two of them in the swift current.

Good News: The Women’s Group voted to send you a get-well card.
Bad News: The vote passed by 31-30.

Good News: The Church Board accepted your job description the way you wrote it.
Bad News: They formed a search committee to find somebody capable of filling the position.

Good News: You finally found a choir director who approaches things exactly the same way you do.
Bad News: The choir mutinied.

Good News: Mrs. Jones is wild about your sermons.
Bad News: Mrs. Jones is also wild about ”Jerry Springer”, “Beavis and Butthead” and “Ishtar.”

Good News: Your women’s softball team finally won a game.
Bad News: They beat your men’s softball team.

Good News: The trustees finally voted to add more church parking.
Bad News: They are going to pave the front lawn of your parsonage.

Good News: Church attendance rose dramatically the last three weeks.
Bad News: You were on vacation.

Good News: Your biggest critic just left your church.
Bad News: He has been appointed the Head Bishop of your denomination.

Good News: The youth in your church come to your house for a surprise visit.
Bad News: It’s in the middle of the night and they are armed with toilet paper and shaving cream.

Creativity

“No matter how old you get, if you can keep the desire to be creative, you’re keeping the man-child alive.” — John Cassavetes

When we tire of well-worn ways, we seek for new. This restless craving in the souls of men spurs them to climb, and to seek the mountain view. — Ella Wheeler Wilcox

“While we have the gift of life, it seems to me the only tragedy is to allow part of us to die whether it is our spirit, our creativity or our glorious uniqueness.” — Gilda Radner

“Curiosity is one of the permanent and certain characteristics of a vigorous mind.” — Samuel Johnson

MS Word Tip - Assign Your Own Shortcut to Close All Documents

If you have been using MS Word for a long time, you will remember that the shortcut to close all open documents was Alt+F4. As of Word 2000, that shortcut no longer closes all documents and exits Word. Instead, it only closes the document on which you are currently working; other documents remain open.

If you want to accomplish the same thing in Word 2000 or later versions, you can hold down the Shift key as you select Exit from the File menu. This obviously isn’t as fast as it used to be (pressing Alt+F4 is quicker), but it still gets you out of all your documents. If you want to customize Word so it works as it used to in Word 97, follow these steps:

  1. Choose Customize from the Tools menu. Word displays the Customize dialogue box.
  2. Click on the Keyboard button. Word displays the Customize Keyboard dialogue box.
  3. Make sure File is chosen in the Categories list.
  4. In the list of Commands, choose FileExit.
  5. Click in the Press New Shortcut Key box.
  6. Press Alt+F4. Word informs you that the shortcut is already assigned to the FileCloseOrExit command.
  7. Click on Assign.
  8. Click on Close to dismiss the Customize Keyboard dialogue box.
  9. Click on Close again.

Devotional Thought - Proverbs 31:8

VERSE:
Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute.

Thought:
All that we have, our possessions, our position, our power, is not ours; it is a gift from God. These gifts are not given merely to make our lives comfortable; they come with responsibility. God expects us to use what we have to champion the rights of those who lack the means to speak for and defend themselves.

Two MS Excel Tips

When you enter a number into Excel and tap the ENTER key, by default, it will change focus to the cell directly below. What if you think it should move to the right? Click Tools | Options | Edit. Now, see the ‘Move selection after Enter’ field? Either change it to another direction or turn the feature off altogether.

Let’s say you’ve got too much vertical data in your spreadsheet. Combine this with countless columns of data and you may very well forget the labels for each set. No worries! Select the row beneath the one you’d like to lock into place, then click Window | Freeze Panes. This will allow you to scroll up and down without having to refer back to each column’s designation. You can do the same thing horizontally. Remember, to select an entire range of cells, single click the appropriate letter or number.

Tags:

Ian's Messy Desk


July 2009
S M T W T F S
« Oct    
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  

Categories